THE TWO PATHS OF BROKENNESS

I told God that I feel broken now with the death of my only child, my son. I am aware of in these moments, the two paths that brokenness presents to us when tragedy or hardship occurs. Will the brokenness we experience lead us to a greater dependence on God? Will it lead to the permanent acknowledgment that our weakness prevails in this life and only the Lord can be our strength? Will it break open our hearts to the point where we have dropped all emotional self-protection and learn to love others as we love ourselves? Will our focus shift to what really matters in this life and see it as Christ sees it?

If the first path that brokenness can lead to is chosen, we retreat in life. No one and nothing matters much anymore. We shove aside the tenderness of heart that the brokenness brings about and shut it out. The heart hardens itself further and the prison doors lock up tighter than ever. Anger, depression, and bitterness progressively develop. The mentality of the “victim” begins to set in in our thought life. The “blame game” or unforgiveness progressively overtakes us which is directed toward God or someone else. In short, we don't see a way out. The fruit of this paradigm shift is emotional, relational, and eventually spiritual decay and deadness. This is the path of a fallen world's way of dealing with the brokenness when it occurs.

The choice of the second path instead can bring a new dimension of life. This is the path I choose. The hardness of heart I had prayed for God to remove several years ago, is gone. My heart is tender now, and when I hear of someone else's tragedy or hardship, I am moved to compassion and even at times, weep for them. Empathy was minimal in my life before, and I didn't take much thought about what others suffer, until now. I had, in the past, cared more about a suffering animal than a hurting human being. I say this to my shame. In repeated prayers over the years I have told God that I knew there was something wrong with this attitude and that I knew it wasn't supposed to be this way. People are supposed to matter far more than animals ( and I deeply love animals). If we're really honest, I think many of us are this way, but don't think about it much. This has changed now for me. Others do matter more. The love of Christ is beginning to prevail in my relationships. The second path's brokenness has caused the best paradigm shift, and is the most fruitful spiritually that can be taken if we choose it. It's fruit is agape love, self-sacrifice moved by compassion, and a helplessness that throws itself into the arms of God every day.

If we allow God to take our brokenness and turn it to the greatest good in our lives, and shun the world's way of facing it, then we have taken the best pathway possible,....it is the path that comes along side and participates in Christ's suffering or attitude that leads to His holiness and the understanding of His heart and His heartbeat.